I enjoy this web site, especially the essay about Detour Spotting. It makes me feel better, because I like it when people with privilege think they are capable of acting with integrity. That's one of the big problems with privilege- people seem to think they can not act like decent polite people. Whether it is men who rape and make excuses for it, rich people making excuses for their bad behavior because of their profit motive, or white people acting shocked that they are expected not to use racial slurs in public, it seems that the more privilege you get, the less you are expected to act with personal integrity.
I guess it's easy to accept the excuses society holds out for your behavior. "They were asking for it" is the most common excuse. Saying that makes it seem like you were somehow forced to engage in bad behavior. The victim somehow made you do something you didn't want to do, that is.
However, acting with integrity is the opposite of that. You take responsibility for your own actions. I mean that in the way that means "I can say no to bad behavior" not the way that means "fuck you". It's really hard to use words that have been co opted to be really judgmental. Like judgmental pricks are always saying take responsibility to the victims of things, as if they caused the problem, not never to the preps. I reject the idea that if you did it first or you did the worst thing that you don't have to take responsibility. Bump that.
Oh yea, and yesterday I was a total jerk. Like I complimented a white dude on not being a racist jerk. I apologized, but that was very mean of me. It's like being complimented on speaking English well to me. I have lived in this country(the US) for my entire life. Of course I speak English well! Likewise, whites are able to not be racist jerks, and should be expected to not be racist jerks. I apologize again for my bad behavior.