Friday, October 31, 2003

It's time for Love Witch wallpaper.
When I was a kid, the labeling hysteria (everyone's LD, everyone's ADD) hit the black kids the hardest. Because of some one's say so, they were labeled with something wrong with them for life, and held back academically in 'special' classes. I escaped this with the mere label of having a lisp. When the second round of labeling came by in middle school, in which we would be divided into normal and honors, I passed easily, being put into honors for say, English, and pre algebra for math.

Of course, there is a split in my abilities. While doing extremely well in English with no prompting, I needed a teacher who actually knew what they were doing in the math department. I was a B (or in latter days, C student in math) This is not a disability- many people made such grades. The third round of labeling attempts is in high school, in which they divide you into honors, AP, regular, and vocational track classes. Many blacks were stuck in the last, although I was in the first for English, history, and biology, and only in honors for chemistry, and in regular for math. This is not a disability many people went into regular math in high school.

So now I am in college, and am seeing a strange difference in this labeling process. I forgot my lab notebook, so instead of trying to help, I get a labeling attempt. This is not a good idea, as these labels are deeply stigmatizing, and without any more proof than that you should not be making an attempt. I have seen girls dump their unknowns and forget to put their test tubes in their lockers. Are they 'disabled'? Worse yet, this prevents me from getting the help I need. I passed Calculus because instead of insulting and stigmatizing me, my teacher let me come before class, and helped me with the problems.

She did not feel the need to ask if I had checked with disability services. She did not feel the need to imply that I was a deficient person because I didn't do this one thing to 'standard'. My chemistry teacher has this problem constantly- implying that we are all stupid because we all failed the quiz isn't going to help us do better dude. And also, I find the idea that you can decide that I am a moron based on one score sort of dumb. Of course, if I was labeled in childhood, I would not be here. They would have retarded my progress and made me feel I was dumb, and couldn't learn. In fact, some of this effect has been observed, although I am an adult. I still feel rage about this, etc. I am even considering sending an editorial to the school newspaper.


Of course, people will insult me for this, but I'd like to tell them to go fuck themselves. Also, a weird link about this. Also, apparently, forty percent of folks are 'diagnosed' in college- although a real pervasive deficit would probably been noticed earlier.

Thursday, October 30, 2003

I watched Bowling for Columbine today. It was good newstainment, agit prop and prank theater all at once. I am slightly confused at the controversy this movie has caused. When we watch the news, we do not get an unbiased picture. Someone decides what footage to put in, what facts to present, what angle they are trying to play to. Not to mention, there is the issue of Foxnews, which may not be 100% accurate.

The focus on the culture of fear was really interesting to me. I remember this year, walking down the streets of downtown Atlanta in broad daylight, and seeing this girl who I was walking to the car with(because she had left her costume for the sci fi convention in the car) freak out because this man said "hey, nice stockings!" to me. She was white and the guy was black, think about it. I also remember a lot of school hysteria. From cheerleaders fearing the freaks to parents fearing all of us, there was a lot of fear and craziness going on. I remember thinking it was ridicolous.

Also, here are two opposing* sides on the factual accuracy of the film, and also, I reccomend an essay about the need for truth to be told in memoirs in this month's Believer magazine.

*However, the statement here about Moore not being sued by anyone is inaccurate, although this is relatively new news.

Wednesday, October 29, 2003

This whole thing has been attributed to Howard Dean, but unfortunately, I can't find where it came from. Read and think about it. I post this because I think this is an important thing to talk about if we're going to fix the problem.

Talking About Race

Race is a difficult subject in America. Politicians often tell black audiences that they believe in civil rights and affirmative action. Some talk about their own experiences in the Civil Rights movement. Some are now attacking the use of the word quotas in front of white audiences. Doing all of this is important.

But it is not enough.

No white American can understand what it means to be black in America. Things have improved significantly for African Americans in this country since 1964. However, it is important to recognize that the Civil Rights Movement was largely a victory over legal segregation. Discrimination still exists, and we must continue efforts to eliminate it.

Polls show that the majority of white Americans believe that race is no longer a big factor in American life, and that equality of opportunity has mostly been successfully incorporated into American political and social culture. Many white Americans assume that whatever segregation remains in the public school systems and universities around the country is either self-imposed or the product of neighborhood schools.

Bill Clinton is the only President or white Presidential candidate I have ever heard talk candidly about issues of race in America. Black Americans still believe, with some justification, that white America does not understand the historical scars left by slavery and Jim Crow, scars which cannot be erased in a generation or two. Black Americans often mistake white indifference or lack of understanding for racism, which is the case in only a small number of instances.

But many white Americans don't understand that indifference and lack of understanding does lead to institutional racism, where, despite the best intentions of the individuals who run the institution, day-to-day hiring practices only reinforce African American fears and suspicions of bias. Just last week, a Wall Street Journal article reported that white job applicants with criminal records were more likely to be called back for job interviews than African American applicants with clean records.

Affirmative action is still needed in order to overcome the unconscious biases that all Americans of every ethnic group have toward hiring people like themselves. And the discussion of that unconscious bias is essential if we are ever going to bridge the gaps between white America and not only African Americans, but the Latino community, Native-Americans, Asian Americans, and women of all ethnic backgrounds.

Talking about race means more than merely mentioning civil rights or condemning the President's use of the word quota. Talking about race means confronting ourselves with the vastly different perceptions that we have about each other, and trying to walk a mile in one anothers shoes.

Race is not simply a matter of civil rights; it can influence the right to thrive and prosper in American society. A discussion of race is incomplete without addressing the impact of race or ethnicity on the ability to access affordable health care, quality education and the capital to build businesses and create wealth.

It is particularly important for white candidates to raise these issues in front of white audiences. This kind of message can be too easily dismissed or pigeonholed coming from a member of a minority community. If America is going to prosper as the most diverse nation on the face of the earth, we are all going to have to take responsibility for the stereotypes we have of each other, and debunk them.

Let us each commit to do our part.

-Governor Howard Dean, M.D.


Song recommendation for the Day: Rockin' The Suburbs by Ben Folds Five. It's nice STFU to guys who think they have the right to bitch when they haven't even tried to pay a fucking due, and if they had to switch places with someone who actually had paid dues would fucking kill themselves. I'm not putting down people in actual pain, and note that to some extent pain is relative, but to tell the truth, I don't care if they made you read an actual book in school, even if it was by a black person or a woman, or that they made some black person recite a Langston Hughes poem on the school TV show once a freaking year. Go and volunteer in a freaking soup kitchen or at least read about people getting their limbs chopped off by machetes or something.
For readers with nappy hair, Nappturality has come back from a redesign. It's a very good resource for those wanting to go natural.
I like iTunes in the evening where there are a lot of people to mooch...I mean 'share' from. It's interesting to hear what others are listening to, but I think it is weird that others are listening to my paltry collection of music(I still prefer CDs for more than one song)

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Porco Rosso will be out in April 2004. The first and second seasons of Sailor Moon are complete and uncut in box sets, although try to watch out for pirates when getting them used. If you're not sure if a particular title is liscenced, animeondvd.com has a pretty comprehensive list, and the anime news network site seems to have a lot of news about what is coming down the pike.
Don't get ripped off by anime bootlegs. Words to watch out for : extra cheap + 'import set' (the real Japanese DVDs tend to cost double what we pay for a DVD in the US), 'all region' or 'region 0' (near all anime DVDs that are licensed are 'region 1'(this is for North Americans), Chinese subtitles, etc.

Why should you care? First, you're paying for something that will probably not have the best translation or picture quality, second, you're paying for what you could get for free. If you're going to pirate, don't pay to pirate. Third, anime companies put out what is profitable. If you're getting ripped off on your favorite show, it's sequel might not come over. So remember, don't be dumb, get a real one!

Monday, October 27, 2003

I still don't want to write my essay, so I'll talk about a surprising occurrence. Once I saw a documentary on Malcolm X on BET(actually having programming that might uplift someone? woah!) but the end bothered me. In the shot you can tell that the classroom is integrated, but only the black kids get up and say "I'm Malcolm X!" (in the shots shown, of course).

I think kids of all races should have done that, since it would have honored Malcolm change of heart. I am remembering these details from The Autobiography of Malcolm X. Anyway, Malcolm X went to Mecca and saw how many different races of Muslims there were, and he had a change of heart. He went from talking about white devils to talking about the connections between different people. That is my favorite turning point ever.

I think that people of every race should be inspired by Malcolm standing up for his rights. Even if he did go wrong in the beginning, I think that we all will go wrong in our lives. Maybe it's better to be able to admit you're wrong than thinking you have to be right all the time. I think that maybe if we learn from what came before, we can become better people.
I don't want to write, so I will rant. My co worker said what I wanted to say. My boss is always like "Sorry your job sucks", and I want to say "What is this supposed to be- the happy fun club? This is a job". But my co worker was much nicer. She said "This is a pretty easy paycheck". And she's right. My biggest work related worries are "Is this skirt modest enough to go to work in?" and "There's nothing good on the radio" and I get a fatter paycheck for less work than I would some other places.

I'm not saying I don't do my work. In fact, I work very hard at it. However, if you're just filing, it's pretty hard to make this work hard, you know? I don't have to talk to people who are angry or babysit someone's random screaming kids. I don't even have to stand up.
One sign you are never getting a real job: You think that Eminem's song "Cleaning Out My Closet"'s connections to confessional literature would be interesting to explore in a short essay.
Random consumerist tidbits. I bought the Nadesico collection from Rightstuf on its Halloween sale. Some may be like 'get it from Ebay', but Ebay is rife with fakes(shitty picture quality, bad translation, your money goes to rip off artists, instead of the people responsible for bringing this stuff to you- unlike the whiners, I understand that anime doesn't come out by magic- those liscencing fees help the companies in Japan produce more anime. )

Also, I had never been in a Loehmann's before, so I was very confused by their store layout. Why do they group it together by designer? Although, this helped my dad spot the display with the skirts that I have been craving. I have one for my prim librarian outfit on Halloween and one just for fun. I am dressing up two days this year- tommorow and Halloween. Tommorow I'll be a Scarlet Woman(who is very tastefully dressed)

I also hate Walmart. Not only do they not let workers form unions(it's the largest private employer in the US- you can't just dismiss these people ), it's full of screaming kids. Great shopping experience? No.

Friday, October 24, 2003

Oh, and gang rape ain't cool.
My new word is perp. A perp is a person who tries to victimize others. I read an article in Bitch magazine(loved it, loved it- articles on the "Cucumber Incident", on Carnie Wilson and Fat Acceptance, an interview w/ the Persopolis author who asks 'why does everyone always ask me why I chose to do a comic? and much more) about domestic abuse victims and pop psych.

I agree with the author that's there's too much stress on how awful the victim is and not enough on how awful the perp is. If you spend all your time ladling guilt on the victim, saying that they are co dependent,etc, all you have is a woman chasing her tail.

But if you punish the perps, the abuse stops, and it stops forever. If we spent half the amount of time we spent trying to hurt the already broken, and more time on standing up to perps, there wouldn't be so many perps.

So if you sit around defending perps, saying "Oh boys will be boys" or "That's just human nature". Think of what stake you have in the status quo. What do you have to gain by having all forms of abuse go on forever?

I think you know what the answer is.
Inspired by Dean's World, which is usually an intelligent conservative blog.

I'd like to say that I don't like misogynistic men. If you have to go to great lengths to 'prove' that half of the human race is not 'logical' (like all men are just the most logical beings on the planet, too) and you try to say that women never did anything(being a goldfish and not seeing that for years, women weren't allowed to do much of anything), maybe you're a misogynist.

My other pet peeve is guys who can't take rejection. Some hot young thing that is way out of their league says "I just want to be friends", and they act like all women are evil incarnate, and just want to be beaten with tire irons. Bonus points for guys who say "No Fat Chicks". I mean, thanks for proving you are slime. If you have to have this perfect girl, why can't she want the perfect guy? And it's not you, because you have the social skills of a poo flinging chimp, and probably smell like one too, but somehow you deserve a girl who looks like your favorite Everquest character? Yea, that's going to happen.

I also don't like goldfish in general. It's not to hard to read the occasional book or even an educational TV show. Just because your parents raised you on Twinkies, ho hos and male supremacy, doesn't mean you need to be a nimrod for the rest of your life. 'Waaaah, it was a long time ago". No, it wasn't, dumbass. If someone's sitting up, telling you about their own experiences with it, it's not a fucking long time ago. How did things that have happened within the life time of a man become so long ago? Being young, I can't say that things that happened before I was born are irrelevant, because the world we live in now comes from the world they lived in then.

You know who makes the rules and laws? Middle aged to old people, mostly. Most folks sitting up in Congress and your state legislatures, etc, are past the age of thirty. What happened to them in their youth and young adulthood, even now effects what laws they are going to pass, and what things they are going to say.

For example, Vernon Jordan(the author of Vernon Can Read, and also a player in the Clinton impeachment trial) was on TV last night, talking about how he was refused an internship, because he was colored. (and the folks really said that, too)Don't you think that is going to affect his worldview? In fact, he joined the Civil Rights Movement, which changed the face of our country.

The thing is to realize that we are not disconnected from what came before. The past's future is the present, and if you forget that, you're going to make the same mistakes or even worse than what came before.

Thursday, October 23, 2003

Two dandy Peter Bagge comics all for you. From Reason magazine, and The Stranger. Extra Credit for the Kiddies: for the Reason cartoon, find three ways Bagge underlines the point he made in the text in the picture.
My definition of a 'long time ago': So long ago no one's alive to tell the story to you.

Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Major Problems:

Things that are keeping me from deciding on a major:

1)Talent:
I'm not good at anything that actually has job potential.

2)Temperment: People are mean to me already. I don't need a job in which people look down on me because I didn't have such good luck as them.

3)Parents: I don't think that I can pay my own tuition, which makes wasting money a very guilt ridden thing to do

4)Debt: You can't pay off debt with a paper hat. on your head, let me tell you.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

The wallpaper for the week is this. I needed a happy picture today to match my mood. Maybe after my midterm, I can finally watch Spirited Away again.
Young people complaining about political correctness confuse me. Are they seriously pretending to remember a time in which non whites or women or gay people weren't allowed their free speech rights to say "Hey, why don't you stop being an asshole?". I think the whole position is a bit wussy. You can say offensive things if you want, it's just that noone will have any sympathy for your moronic ass. If you need sympathy to offend people, what sort of person are you?

Yea, you can still call people the n word, but don't be surprised when people look at you funny or beat you down. You still have the choice, others just can say, fuck you to you. I think maybe that's a better set up, but I am a young person, and not white, and plus, I'm really small. So I think hmmm, maybe I shouldn't be an asshole to this 6 foot tall person... But then again, I grew up in an environment where people were mostly of different race from me, so maybe I have learned to be less of a bastard in general.

Also, about this guy: what a moron. You can't take a symbol and pretend it means whatever you want. I can't wear a Swaztika and say "It stands for how much I like magazines." If you're working in that sort of job, not offending the people who are probably going to come to you probably is a good idea.

Sunday, October 19, 2003

Hey, everyone. Give stuff to the kids of Iraq! Just my do gooding for the day. This site is also about sending toys to the children of Iraq. It expresses this person's hopes about what the toys might help create.
I'm a morning person. I always have the greatest energy and hope in the light of the rising sun. I like to believe in hope, and revolution. Maybe it's not the best thing to believe in, but hey, people believe in worse everyday.

I like old MoTown Songs- those tended to show a lot of hope. I'm listening to People Get Ready now. I see it not as a religious song, but as a song about revolution. Isn't that odd? But then again, everyone changes the songs they listen to to fit into what they are thinking about. I rarely think about God, but I often think about changing things.

So let's end with a quote- "There ain't no room for the hopeless sinner, who would hurt all mankind just to save his own"

Saturday, October 18, 2003

Yay, it seems that the Critic is coming to DVD in February. I only saw a few episodes, but what I saw captivated me.

Friday, October 17, 2003

At MC contests, I greatly prefer MC's who make clever references, whether it be from the Bible, pop culture or just what's in the news, to show why their opponents are secretly faggots who suck cock, that their opponent's female relatives are sexually promiscuous (extra points if you can put a reference to matzoh balls in there) and that their race is full of terrorists who crash planes into buildings*.



*Although I'd prefer you not bring up people's ethnicities. But if you're going to do it, make it clever.
A note for Windows users: remember to download the newest Windows service packs.before using iTunes. Mine used to skip before I updated. Yes, I don't always download the lastest service packs. Oh well.
I've heard a delicous rumor. Princess Tutu might be liscenced. I look foward to the day.

Thursday, October 16, 2003

I'd like to remind everyone to be empowered. You don't have to be on dope or in thrall to a cult leader to have a good life, unless you have a very severe condition.
Woooohoooo! After a year or more of not writing one line, I wrote some poetry. It's only substandard haiku about chemistry, but it's something. Of course, I will not make the general public suffer my poetry.
Great news for legit music lovers. itunes for windows! An odd feature that I have noticed- a 'music allowance' for kids. I guess that makes sense, but you wouldn't think people would think of that.

This also means that illegal downloaders have to shut up. It's not $18 or whatever fake ass price you made up for one song, and the RIAA is embracing the online market. $1 to 'sample' the same song you've 'sampled' three million times on the radio isn't that much. Although, I think I might use this to get into some of that conscious hip hop I've been hearing about.

I will have to be careful, or I'll be broke, just on finding the perfect MoTown arrangement(if they have it, I have to check)


Also, here's a random piece by some smart old dude
I'm politically correct and proud. I call people what they want to be called. I don't think it's sooooo haaaaaard to not call people names. I realize that there's not just one group that has the monopoly on mattering, and that people's achievements don't stop being achievements because they were born the 'wrong' race or sex. I even try to listen to other people's viewpoints instead of thinking that what I see from my side is the be all end all. I think these are traits that more people should have, but that's just me.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Today I saw Women in the Mirror. It's a pretty good movie. It has that whole theme of searching down. The mother is searching for her daughter, and her past. The woman who may or may not be her daughter is searching for herself, and a connection to others. The grand daughter is searching for herself also.

I like the whole mirror motif. The broken glass seems like the open wound Hiroshima has left on everyone. I like how everyone ends up being reflected in the mirror, or seen 'through' the mirror.

I also like the omious score. Apparently this was a pre premeire showing or something.

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

I am amused that the skeptic dictionary has an entry on neurolingual processing. Anyway, the upshot is that if it's too good to be true, if it promises to change your life, if someone is selling you something(a book, a magazine, vitamins) it's probably not the best thing to base your life off of. If more people followed those rules, a lot of people would not be huckstered.
I think that putting God into schools is a big problem as there are so many different sorts of people in our country. We have atheists, Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Jews, Buddhists. If one god gets put in, we have to put all gods or lack of beliefs in god into our schools, and that'd be a bit waste of time. Oh, and here's what brought this on.
It's interesting that I have found some articles articulating my vague discomfort with pop pysch. I really don't believe in it, as I have noticed it seems a lot like the religious fads I sometimes see- like WWJD, the prayer of Jabez or fasting(for protestants, I mean). Everyone gets all excited about it, and it's the whole new thing, and then it dies down.

However, pop pysch seems to be a bit more damaging because most people don't know that say, magazine articles or books have a bias whether intended or not. They are slanted to what seems to sell more, and outrageous claims and selective use of journal articles seems to sell more than careful documentation and more measured claims.

Also, the fact is that no one thing can be the way as people vary. So when people try to fit everyone into one mold, it doesn't work. For example, I'm not very spiritual, so a spiritual answer might not work for me.

So I say that everyone should approach things with caution and use their critical thinking skills.

Monday, October 13, 2003

Today, I went into a black bookstore for the first time. Let me explain. In the suburbs, independent book stores are very rare, and bookstores catering to blacks are even rarer. So curiosity caused me to be able to give Afro books a chance. It was a basic bookstore, although a bit of clearer labeling of the sections would be nice. There was a very large sale as the bookstore had too many of the same books. I would have also liked a bit of a larger selection, but it's not like I come in all the time, and people have to cater to the people who actually come in and buy stuff.

I got Wounds of Passion by bell hooks, and Black, White, and Jewish by Rebecca Walker. Maybe I won't have time to read since it's mid terms time, but at least I know when I have time, I will be in for a treat, and if it's not so good, at least I only paid five dollars each.

Saturday, October 11, 2003

If any readers are about to graduate from college, and are worried about getting a job, I would urge them to consider the Teach for America program. Not only will this help bridge the gap between well funded schools and not so well funded schools, people in this program will also be paid and trained. It's a great way to help. And for everyone else, become a tutor, teach a kid to read or do math. It's so rewarding, and helps bring up achievement.

Friday, October 10, 2003

Just because you can't change the world doesn't mean you have to give up and die. This summer, I was in an internship program, which matched up minority students with hospitals so they could intern there. The assistant director said some things that I found interesting. He talked about how we should use this experience so that we got the position where we have the power. I think that while revolution is alright, the people who come from inside the system and change it are even better. The people who educate the next generation are the best of all. So stop being a prick, and get out there and do it!

Thursday, October 09, 2003

"Are we going to live together, or are we going to live..." Mister Senior Love Daddy. Do The Right Thing

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

I don't believe that everyone gets to where they are in life by themselves. My parents didn't do crack, they fed me so I could become intelligent(malnutrition makes you stupid), and they worked hard and sacrificed so I could go to school. So I can't really look down on the poor, or the knocked up, or anyone. Maybe if I had raised myself from a baby or something I could pretend that I wasn't helped or that I wasn't dealt a good card. But very rarely do you see someone make it by themselves, even Bill Gates had a rich family.

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

This blog's entry for today has so much truth in it, I can't say anything better. I think that we should confront racism. I don't mean like the Black Panthers, and I realize that anger itself is not a revolution, all this pretend it doesn't matter shit isn't going to help anyone. I feel that we can prevent bad things from happening in the future if we do somehting today. I don't mean we can prevent everything, but seriously, there's a bit of causality here. I should study chemistry and create a future in which I've passed it now, tho.

But before then, this comic strip sums it all up.
Things that you should never do: 100% based on reality(but most of them happened to others)

Never talk about how a young kid won't live past X age in front of them.

Never write 5 page letters about how someone is too fat, and how they should go on a diet if they want dates, and then send them a fucking diet book.

Never suggest someone has a learning disability if they are having difficulty in your class.

Never accuse people of not doing their work just because they finished extra fast. CHECK!

Monday, October 06, 2003

This article would make even the biggest 'get over it, you whiner' type person weep. This is great writing because you can't turn away, you can't dehumanize or demonze the suicides. You can't pretend a little bit of patronizing assholism would make everything better. This guy is my writing idol now.
Some people may complain about the National Endowment for the Arts, although we spend a much lesser percent of our national budget on it than we use killing little boys and girls or ensuring perks for the rich. However, it has produced some worthwhile work. For example, last night, I saw a film about the black theater during the 1960s. Instead of having this part of history lost, or only rediscovered when the people who had been doing it were all dead, they created a film about the history of this, and how it came to be.

Sure, it's not going to make you money, but some things are a bit more important than money. The sense of vision they all shared, the sense of creating a new thing, the realization that it takes more than anger to make a revolution, I really got that from there. Of course, if you were only sitting around hoping for an easy grade, you wouldn't get anything out of it.

It's pretty sad that most young folk don't recognize the fact that you got to get everything out of every opportunity you have. I don't mean run over people or anything, I mean that if you got smart people around you, pick their brains. If you have an opportunity to get some knowledge, get it. The tough economy is not a reason to forget this, we should do this more than ever now.

I mean, how are you going to come to college and get out with a head full of nothing? You just wasted your time if you do that. You might as well have worked at a gas station if you just wanted to party down and fuck. You say you care about money, so why you waste thousands of it, not going to class, not doing your work, not doing anything? Man, shitheads. Heads full of nothing.
It is eating me up inside that I didn't get that issue of The Sun today. I should be conducting market research and trying to score free magazines instead of goofing off. It was only four dollars too. I hope I will remember to get it tommorow. I bought the Believer instead and didn't want to spend $11 at one pop on magazines. Then again, if noone buys magazines for people with IQs above room temperture, how am I going to write for them? So I should support good magazines, you know or all the magazines we'll ever have will be shit, shit and more shit.

Also, why aren't there feminist magazines for teenagers? There are magazines for grown up women with the requisite naughty ads, and magazines for little girls, with lots of cute stories about girls around the world, but between 12 and 18, girls are tossed a bunch of crap about how they should be thinner and wear more makeup so guys will like them. Why? It's not like Bitch is selling in Cosmo numbers, but they still sell it, you know?

Saturday, October 04, 2003

I never got people complaining about fat people 'because it's unhealthy'. I mean, I'm skinny, and I drink soda, and crap, and many other skinny people drink beer, eat pizza, and shove twinkies in their mouths. In fact, the skinny person who lives off of one grape might even be in the minority . That is unhealthy- but they don't get any flak for it. I could eat a big fat cheese burger in public, while chugging on some diet coke, and noone would say anything, and that's bull- just because I'm naturally skinny doesn't make that sort of eating habit any better. I guess people start being assholes and make up half assed reasons for it, but it's pretty damn dumb.

I see skinny people in the school cafeteria loading up like four plates of food, full of grease and salt and shit, and noone says anything because they 'look ok', but if some fatty was to walk in like that, they'd be acting like dumbasses in no time. It's not like this stuff magically becomes nutrient filled just because it's not causing you to balloon to 200 pounds. Of course, if you needed this, you'd not be reading all the way down here, or are probably saying some simplistic BS totally ignoring that people have different bodies. So basically, fuck you assholes. Get a bit of fucking compassion. It's so easy to get fat with all this calorie rich food around that noone in America should ever say anything bad about fat people.

I don't because I know that I might have it made now, but when I get over 30, my metabolism is going to change. I'm probably going to struggle with my weight. And I'm sure the person I'll be when I'm 30 will appreciate me not being a fucking asshole.
(spoilers for Rose of Versailles up to episode 16) One interesting theme in the Rose of Versailles is people creating new lives for themselves. Most of the time, these characters may not be the most morally pure- Madame DuBarry used to be a common prostitute, and survived for many years by manipulating people. However, there isn't really a huge amount of moral condemnation for people who gain power this way. Yes, they are shown as evil people, but instead of presenting them as villains for our heroine Oscar to face, we get to hear their side of the story.

For example, when Oscar is walking Madame DuBarry away from the castle when the Louis the XV died, DuBarry talks about after living in the gutters for such a long time, she was anxious to do anything to survive, and how after a while, she started to hunger for jewels as she used to hunger for bread.


Of course, not everyone who goes through such a transformation is morally shifty. The beautiful and moral Rosalie disguises herself as a noble to avenge her dead mother, although she might actually be of noble blood. It is interesting how common pretending to be a noble is- but then again, as France is a pretty big country, and you can't account for every cousin of a cousin, it couldn't have been too hard to slip one over on someone.
Public Service Announcement: Did you get drunk and fuck someone you would rather not have? Maybe you can't avoid getting the AIDs, but emergency contraception can prevent pregnancy! Not the 'abortion pill'- this is basically a high dose birth control pill- if taken within 72 hours, it can save you from a lot of trouble and pain. I believe some colleges have them at their student health services! So remember- don't get knocked up!
Also, I'd like to add in a bonus anecdote. Yesterday, we had about ten people and two cars. So one of the guys who was in the smaller car rode in the trunk for part of the way. Amazingly, he didn't get any bruises and reason prevailed and he rode in the back of the nice SUV for the rest of the trip.
Two amusing anecdotes. There was this guy with a roommate that was a drug dealer. Some of the guys the roomie was dealing to decided to come over and take their stuff. They called to see if the roomie was home, and when he wasn't, they came over, tied this guy up with Ethernet cable(the only thing there was to tie him up with) and took his DVDs, CD and his roomie's safe. However, there is a good possibility these people will be caught by the police. The guy knows where they live.

Here's a nice Dragoncon anecdote. Several years ago, a girl I know was in Comic Artists' alley, and she had the best luck- Colleen Doran herself gave her a copy of a Distant Soil(ok, there was coffee spilled on it) But that was really cool- Colleen's like my idol.

Friday, October 03, 2003

(Spoilers for Rose of Versailles up to episode 15) In episode 15, RoV gets back on track. In episodes 13 and 14, there was a bit of unforunate glurge as Oscar finds out what is really going on in the country side. But 15 gets back to the court intrigues that make this series so fun. Yet again the innocent and kind Antoinette is confused by a scheming court member. The emphasis on how her good qualities can be turned so that she becomes a tragic figure is a major theme of this show.
I am also interested in race, because it is like hidden knowledge. Very few people say, know anything about black history, and many people try to pretend that there's no discrimination. So knowing about those topics is having something over others. Also, there's also a lot of interesting debate. Like should blacks assimalate or should they keep seperate? I think I am a bit more assimilationist than some, probably because say, all black clubs lack the whole conversational prompt element that I like organizations I join to have- for example, if I'm at a writer's workshop, I can ask 'what do you write?" but at the BSA, I'm at a loss. I guess that's more of a personal problem, but a lot of people are shy and akward, I'm sure.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

I'm secretly obsessed with food. My entire day is often planned around meal times- whether I have enough time for lunch, whether I can get something cheap for dinner. Even my career anxiety is based around a fear of eating ketchup soup for the rest of my life. When I talk about sex, I even use desert metaphors- 'you're not getting any pie" or "you can't have a cookie" It's pretty subtle; I hardly notice I am thinking about food all the time, but it pervades my entire life. In a way, that is extremely strange, but I'm sure everyone has that sort of craving. Whether it be for sex, money or power, there's something that drives you. Although it is probably a bit stranger to be rhapsodizing about mashed potatoes than it is to be about a really attractive girl...
I'm too nervous to do anything productive today, so I'll note that AA /= quotas, which is always good to know. From the article:

"Support for the university came from several civil liberties organizations and lawyers, including the American Bar Association.

The case was the most recent examination of US race relations since the court's decision in the Bakke versus Board of Regents case in 1978.

That case was brought by a white student, Allen Bakke, who argued that he had been passed over by the University of California at Davis medical school in favour of minority candidates.

In that instance, racial quotas were struck down, but universities were still permitted to consider race as a factor in admissions. "

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

My music loving friend gave me this web site, and check out the multimedia- this music is really great. A mix of jazz and electronic music it sounds like to my non musical ears. According to that guy, their label is Ninja Tunes(this is for people who don't buy major label)