Saturday, December 31, 2005

I never go out for new year's, so the rest of us losers can read a page in which woman haters get owned.
I've put new things on my 43 Things.
This new year's eve I'm dedicating to hating everyone and bitching about how 2005 blew donkey balls. I have to admit that this stupid so called humor article is the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my life. Oh, NOES, women don't dress up in costumes for your pleasure! *gasp* They have the NERVE to wear whatever they god damn please even if they are 300 pounds. Look, dumbass, cosplay is for fun, not so some dumbass can ogle. Also, I hate people who are like "ha ha, fun is for nerds". Hey, at least I can talk to people I don't have to funnel a keg of everclear to be able to stand.

This guy is too stupid to deal with, so I'll make a list of weird stuff that has been stolen from my parents: a mantle, aluminum siding, plaster, paintbruses, dishwasher space(some guy washed his clothes in the dishwasher of a house we were saving to rent),etc.
Someone's Japan pictures! It seems like she hit all the great gothic lolita stores! Also, Vivienne Westwood got damed.

Friday, December 30, 2005

Great Art. Intro to African Lit on blackfolk. Just ignore the first two posts.
Tip: Don't be racist on the train.
I got an A in European History, a B in African Art History, a B+ in Psychology of Religion, an A in Beginning Swimming, and a C- in methods. My GPA remains a 3.2.
P6 notes the sympathy given to drug dealing, criminal white teens.
Peach Girl has regained it's momentum in episode 8. It's odd to see how the character of Sae gives it its strength. She's so spoiled and jealous! I like the wacky animation too. A perfect vacation anime.
The debunkingwhite skinhead Kwanzaa thread has now spun out to valuable reflections on being critical. It's worth your while to visit it. I need to read Killing Rage too. Maybe when school starts again, and I can get it from the library. One comment on the thread that really struck me was about the eurocentric ethic of saying one thing, and doing another. I have to admit that I do associate this with white people, and I find it very confusing. If you say you care about the poor, then do things to improve their situation. Don't take away food from poor kids' mouths, and say you are helping because they'll be 'self reliant'. Like WTF? Also, if you say you care about babies, then don't only talk about them when they are in somebody's womb- help them after they are born! I just don't get it.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

I saw ParaKiss Episode 10. It's great! I always have loved Isabella's speech in which she talks about how George gave her the courage to dress as a woman. It's beautiful to me, because maybe if a boy can become a girl, a shy person can become a confident one. And I loved to see the dress finally animated. It was almost as good as when I saw a reproduction of the dress at AWA. Now that's love for a series- to reproduce an entire elaborate dress. Someday I'll learn to sew!
Point of fashion: thrift store finds.
Paradise Kiss 10 is out! And I'm glad I had the energy to blog today, but I'm tired now.
Molly gives some cogent points on the shitty role models teen girls have today. However, there are magazines that aren't totally terrible for teens. For example, BUST occasionally drags out those shitty role models, but mostly focuses on women doing rather than women appearing. (because of frank sex talk, it's for over 16s or so). For lovers of crafts, there's Readymade. For younger girls, there is New Moon magazine(full disclosure- I had an article published in New Moon some years ago). Also suitable for girls under 16 is blackgirl magazine. Of course, the best way to know what magazines a young girl wants is to tailor them to their interests.
Everyone Hates Chris is actually a fun show, but I'm shocked that anyone would allow their kids to watch it.
Nubian has a beautiful post with great comments on racism. One commenter asks why we don't talk about complicity much. I think it's because they are dangerous waters. You say something about complicity around the wrong person, and your conversation gets the tone of "whites aren't to blame for slavery because Africans sold slaves". (as if the evil evil Africans made them buy them and treat them poorly).
I was amused by the fark stuff. The first comment was kinda dumb, but I loved the reply:

2005-12-29 09:35:18 AM IamPatSajak

"You've got the top PennDOT engineering brains looking at it," Mr. Bonstedt said. "I'm sure the post-mortem will tell us exactly what went wrong."

There is so much wrong with that statement I'll just leave it at this: I have been to numerous PennDots, and every single one hires two types of people:
1. Mentally Retarded (seriously)
2. "Shaniqua" the biatchy woman that won't even look at you or talk to you as she is supposed to be helping you out. She's too busy talking to the person next to her about what her baby daddy is up to, or who got shot.

Also- in PA more then 80% of bridges are not up to standards. Penn Dot takes an average of 5-7 years to complete any road work. (seriously) I moved to MD and between June and October they had built an entire new overpass by my house, and it is beautiful! Stone accents, iron decorative gaurd rails.. and they were working on it EVERY DAY! It is not uncommon to see a PennDot project get started, then go untouched for up to a year. (See: Leader's Heights exit on 83, or the 81/83 split as examples)

2005-12-29 11:56:08 AM control

Umm.. when did I make a racist comment?

I am shocked, shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you, that using terms like Shaniqua and "baby-daddy" would be considered racial stereotyping. This whole Political Correctness thing has gone too far. Can't we make our implied denigrations in peace?

Of course, someone else explained it straight:

2005-12-29 01:20:27 PM neven

Umm.. when did I make a racist comment?

You described in offensive terms and tone a woman with traits associated in our culture with the character of a poor, uneducated, self-righteous black woman. Absolutely no one here will believe for a second that you had in mind a white or race-neutral person.

Out of all the characters you could have picked, you picked her. Your list contained all of two entries, and lumping your stereotypical Shaniqua in with the retarded is a strong implication of how you feel about her.

Not that I needed to explain any of this to you. You think that there's nothing wrong with pointing out "the truth", only "the truth" is, in your case, a racist stereotype.

You made a racist statement, QED.

So don't use racial sterotypes, dumbasses.
On Alas a Blog, there's a big argument about whether we should have radical feminist only threads. I'm mostly in favor, although I think people of all genders should be able to participate. As a race woman, I understand how annoying it is to have a conversation of importance derailed because of some jackhole wondering why us uppity colored folk think we need to have rights. Basically, these threads are where grown folks can talk. It's hard to argue theorectical questions, when people are still questioning whether you are a human being or not.

That's also the source of much of the anger that some people have remarked on coming from actual feminists. When you're reacting to something like a woman being accused of a crime for reporting a rape, then is not the time to hear about how all women are evil liars who pretend to be raped for shits and giggles. It's hard to get much serious discussion done when the people talking are not arguing in good faith. When people are not being honest about themselves and their positions, and spending a lot of time in passive aggressive attacks, the people who really are interested in feminism, rather than bothering people on the internet get distracted.

There are many many spaces where rank idiocy will not be challenged. I'm glad for the spaces in which they are challenged and the ones that are mostly moron free. The trolls often complain "Can't you take someone disagreeing with you?" The problem is that this is not like disagreeing on whether the 'new look' style or gothic lolita is cuter- this is about people's real lives, and real suffering is caused by the lies these trolls spread. A lot of the arguments the trolls waste time with are like people arguing that the earth is flat. Not everything is up for debate- and I think some of these are the needs for every human being for rights and dignity.
Here's how I keep my vagina smelling fresh without douches. I sleep without underwear. Apparently the extra air circulating keeps everything smelling good. I also recommend cotton panties and the occasional bath. If your vagina continues to smell like a buffalo died in it, go to the doctor.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Lately if someone tells a joke with a stereotypical premise (like the Japanese mispronounce their Rs) I've started to be like HUH? What? I don't get it. Hopefully folks will get the message.
Ghetto Lolita? Also, my cousin might have a baby today or tomorrow.
Wow, what a glorious dress. It's only a little bit too big! Another beautiful but super expensive dress. It's too bad I can't afford this top. I bet it'll be bid up to over $50.
I have to admit that The Horse and His Boy bothered me when I was a kid. I couldn't articulate it then, but now I see that what was bothering me was similar to what was bothering this commentator. Even as a child, I felt a little bit uncomfortable with the idea that you could tell who was a bad person just by looking at them. I understand that it's hard to be a white guy in England in the 50s, and end up without a white supremacist outlook, but maybe we need to encourage children to read a wide range, so that they aren't as harmed by this outlook.

I think the problem with white supremacy and patriarchy is not so much the expression of those views in themselves, but the fact that they are taken as the only point of view. I read many of the so called classics of literature, such as Narnia and Lord of the Rings when I was a child, I also read many other books with conflicting views of who was a hero, and who was a sidekick, of who was good, and who was evil.

There were princesses who teamed up with dragons, brave female knights, Native American girls who survived off the land, and many many black boys and girls fighting anything from slavery and apartheid to school bullies. The diversity of the view points shielded me from several poisonous ideas. One was the idea that black folks are stupid. The literary excursions of my childhood had prepared me for Ralph Ellison, Audre Lorde, and Richard Wright. Ideas like feminism and black pride were conveyed to me inside their words. Another idea that the variety of literature I read protected me from was the idea that there's only one way to tell a story. Instead of that's the way it is, I thought "Hey, it doesn't have to be this way"

And that made all the difference.
How a bunch of assholes ruined Jesus for a Jewish dude.
More Lolitas, and an aristocrat. I didn't sew today, but mama brought me baklava.
I've decided that John Scalzi is my hero now. 4 book projects in a year! That's amazing.
I still *heart* this talented cutie. Also, this loli elf.
So cute! I need to learn to sew so I can make a replica...

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Thoughts on transracial adoption. I can't wait until I get the energy to write again.
Wooo! New FRUITS scans. One of my ambitions in life is to make an American version of FRUITS.
Image Hosted by

Woah, a union label! I found this in a dress I bought from a thrift store, so I have no idea how old it might be. It might be a vintage 80s dress, maybe?
More commentary on that weird skinhead Kwanzaa thing. I still don't know what to think except wtf? On my other blog, I will have Kwanzaa values until Kwanzaa ends.
The hero tag for those who helped save Body and Soul. Hero tags all around to everybody who has subscribed to a little magazine, who has given a tip to a blogger, who has bought from their neighborhood bookstore, who has worked to spread independent media! I raise my glass to all of you!

Sunday, December 25, 2005

For some reason, now I have a lot of guilt about having an ipod. It's really odd.
So my whole family is either sleeping or with their girlfriend's sister's sister in law's brothers husband(??), so I will blog. Well, yesterday's big Xmas eve arguments was my big brother versus my other brother's girlfriend. Apparently, my big brother thinks she's too young(she's 19), and talked about how my other brother needs to mash up her food, and change her diaper. She retaliated by saying that he was an old hippie. Also, the Christmas eve political argument was subprime lending- evil predators who bilk honest people out of money or slightly shady but legit alternative to banks who won't give anybody a loan? My mom was for the latter, and dad was for the former. I mostly didn't talk.

Today I got an ipod, Fledgling by Octavia Butler, Anasai Boys, some book about the Quarter Life crisis, Final Fantasy X-2,a mix CD by my brother, some Xmas cash, and also some clothes that we bought in a sale, but were wrapped anyway- some khakis and a nice suit coat.

My big brother got a food processor(he got an expresso machine for his bday), some French CDs from me, and some other stuff. My other brother got a guitar and a netflix subscription(from me). His g/f got some soap or something. Mom got boots, wasabi peas, some soap from Squeaky Queen(I bought her that), and some other stuff. Dad got some sort of laser leveling thing, a huge Brown stein(from me), and some other stuff. Happy merry everybody.
EBrown asks with the negativity coming out of the public mouth pieces of Blacks, why aren't we more despairing? Because seriously, it's like listening to white folk. They would look at my family and be like "Your cousin got 4 kids, and no husband. Your other cousin nearly got fired off substitute teaching for checking a kid. Your brothers don't have big fancy jobs in offices" and never see how much fun we have playing guitar and singing or recounting my cousin with the 4 kids' kids' adventures. They've never seen my cousin getting married in Jamaica or my aunt being sent to San Francisco by her kids. They can't see the positives because they choose not to, but we do choose to see them, and that makes all the difference.
I overate. Here's my xmas in pictures.

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Sarahlynn exposes some of the sad blindness to what is in our own backyard.
It seems that Body and Soul needs a few donations to keep running. I gave a few bucks. We all need great writing on the web.
Apparently my brother is supposed to be on a show Suburban Underground. If you see an actor called Jason Weary, it's my brudder.
I've started a crappy page for book donations to my mom's 8th grade classroom.

Friday, December 23, 2005

I'm a bit confused about this. On one hand, I want to be like "Just as long as they aren't like HA HA! STUPID NIGGERS!! Let them do whatever" but on the other hand, there's a lot to be said for keeping some stuff inside the 'fam'.
Lolita wardrobe guide. Also this is my 1800th post. It's easy when all your posts are two lines long!
So many great writers in this country, and we got folks watching King Kong, and thinking that's a work of art.
My favorite part of this interview is when Nikki Giovanni talks about how can you say what poor people should or should not have. I have to admit this drives me nuts. All I did was successfully pass out of my mama's vagina, and I can spend all my money on comic books and $100 jeans if I want, but somebody who got laid off by some heartless corporation wants to buy a steak for her son's birthday, well, she's the devil incarnate. How dare she waste *our* money on nutritious iron giving protein? Geh, I just don't get it.
On TV, a Christmas story- Georgia soldiers try to save an Iraqi baby.Sen Chambliss has shown some support for this. Also, I emailed the new Tavis Smiley show about possible podcasts on itunes. I got a reply saying they were looking into the feature. Help support black radio- email them and ask for podcasts.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Some random white guy I don't know has amazing insight into white priviledge(sp?). Also, an enlightening conversion on appropiation, religion, and all that good stuff. Also, finally a Left Behind Friday.
Xmas Loli! Tomorrow, I'll attempt to sew. I'll also help my mama bake cookies. In more good news, Kamikaze Girls is coming out on DVD in January. So much great stuff is coming out, but I should save, as I graduate in May, and I want a car, and an apartment... Not to mention I want to get my masters.
I'm actually slightly surprised that a political flamewar broke out on the comics board. Of course, this reminds me that I really need to get HATE.
I really like Dan Clowes. I reread Caricature and have to admit I love both his misfit characters and his retro inspired art. It must take forever to draw.
Hana Yori Dango is so great! I thought the next two volumes after the Miss Teen Japan thing would be a let down, but it's still great fun. Well, the series is 35 volumes long, so if they couldn't keep serving up the fun only half way through, it'd be a total letdown. I haven't goofed off like this in a long time! It's really refreshing. But since I have free time I have to do an overhaul of my website. Darn you, post office.

I have even more to do. I want to get people to donate their old manga to mom's class, but I'm now too shy to do it. It's terrible.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Hey, there's new Love and Rockets! I haven't even read all of the old ones. It's a long series, which I believe was started before I was born. I went to Borders hoping to find some of the older graphic novels, but all I found was Locas, which is a good start for the beginner, but I hear doesn't have all of the stories. Palomar has more, but even the two together do not have everything...
I have to admit I love Box Office Poison. Not for the story so much as the creative use Robinson makes of the comic medium. He's not afraid to create a separate picture with the panels or use overlapping speech bubbles to show a stream of consciousness. He also does a pretty good portrait of wasted lives in New York City. But I love him more for tricks like drawing Ed the way he imagines himself during a drunken dance or having an angel dog motif throughout the chapter about a character's dog dying.
Now the government is scared of old quakers. I'm probably on some watch list too, what with my anime watching, beading ass! I bet they aren't watching Neo Nazi groups, or 'pro life' groups, which of course, do a lot of domestic terrorism, or at least more than two old hippies.
So called nice guys are mocked. Something positive has the best comic ever on the nice guy topic. Also, dumb ass O'Reilly dittoheads managed to ruin the spirit of Christmas.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Final count: 3119 words. If any one wants to read my paper, just ask. It's not Shakespeare, but hey, most of it is spelled right unlike my blog.
2,800, and yes, it does hurt my heart that Morgan Freeman's words have been distorted so. The minions of stupidity are so many and powerful, and people talking sense are so few.
2,700, and now with no idea of how to end. I'll play some games and come back.
2,500! I'm on the home stretch! It's at this part of the paper in which you go back and see what other sections you can add things to. Edit it a bit. Then go back to the end and see if you can bring it to an end. If not, you'll have to keep fooling with it.
2,200, and personal responsibility, my ass! As if poor people just go to the doctor for the fun of it.
My paper is due at midnight, and I only have 2,100 words. Read this though. It's good.
Is this the complete anime classic Onii-sama E? It seems likely, and I'll try to find out. If it is, I'll have the whole series on CD! W00t.

I'm also up to 2000 words on my religion paper. Also, my art history test was recognized by my messy handwriting.
It's time for....uneducated bitching about the transit strike! A lot of people on this thread are bitching because A)the workers aren't 'skilled' B)They got a crappy deal from their own jobs. As for A, not everyone is going to be able to go to college, especially with the price going up. That's no reason that they shouldn't be able to strike out for what they want. B) if you have a crappy deal from your own job, well, whose fault is it? Not these guys! Reading Steve Gillard's take, I have to agree with the people who say "Hey, if they have such a sweet deal, why don't you apply?" I think I'll stay with an office job if that's ok with everyone. At least I'm inside, and am not tired from physical labor.
ARGH!!!! I forgot to sign my art history exam! Also, I skipped town. But in good news, 1608 words!
Feministe breaks down an abstience only site which is telling lies to teenage girls. There are so many great sex education sites out there like and the forum vaginapagina, which offer real female friendly and body positive infomation that no teen girl should be reading the bogus infomation on those stupid sites. Are you an educator or a parent? Give out those sites! Heck, I learned something from looking at Scarlet Teen today, and I'm 21!

Monday, December 19, 2005

I'm exhausted. 1536 is the final word count for today.
Up to 1461 words! I also did more 'research' by asking my mom and dad what they thought. Mom, a Baptist said that to be absent in the body was to be present with the Lord, according to Paul. Dad, a Jehovah's Witness, said that when you're dead, you're dead, but you'll be resurrected after the second coming and then either go to heaven(the select) or to hell(apparently the rest of us)
Am I the only one who wonders if I'll ever have an extra $600 to blow on clothing? I only have $400 total!
WOOO HOOO!!! I've got the first thousand words in my religion paper down! Of course, it's supposed to be 3000 words and due tommorow. But I'm glad I came home- these primary documents'(ok, I borrowed some programs from homegoing celebrations) and 'ethnographic research' (ok, I interviewed the guy down the street's dad, and went to a homegoing celebration in the summer) will help my paper immensely. It's just the 'research'(I got some books from the theology library) that is hard.
Another blackfolk rant. It's been said many times in many ways: shut the fuck up to you!
I think I like this podcast. I think podcasts will be my new addiction. In their interview, the author talks about how white people need to be open to criticism by other groups. This is true. Some whites have actually tried to act like I'm racist, by pointing out the fact that whites are in fact, not angels from heaven. I'm a black person. We get criticized more harshly by ourselves than anything I have ever said about a white person. I think coming to terms with the idea that white supremacy is a myth is a good way to start seeing white people's humanity. It's hard to see others as human if you can not see them as people with flaws. Our society sets up this dichotomy in which white people are all things good, with a few exceptions, and black people are all things bad, with a few exceptions, but that is not a realistic picture of either one of these groups. We need to see the 'dark' side of white society, and the bright side of black society so that we can talk about our whole society as it really is. You can't fix society if you can't see it realistically. And pretending that white people's behavior is not a legitimate thing to be criticized when you feel free to criticize blacks even though the most you know about black people is what you've seen on TV is just straight hypocrisy.

Also, here's more on the Morgan Freeman controversy.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

The latest rumor is that the President referred to the Constitution as a god damned piece of paper. I'm not too sure about the sourcing, but it's disturbing if true.
Watching the interview, Morgan Freeman comes off as much less of a tom than he does in the news articles. He has a joking tone- noting that there's no one month they talk about white history. He's trying to imply it's talked about all the time. I like how they selected the most 'white friendly' excerpts. They didn't talk about how he felt that the Mississippi flag would never represent him or how he mocked the "some of my best friends are X" crap. No, what gets the headlines are a poor choice of words. I blame the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy.
White folks!!!!!
Do the same thing - attend people of color panels and listen to what they have to say. Just as the men will, you’ll hear a lot of shit you might not want to about yourselves. You are here, and you have come again because you are best equipped and are needed to take that message back to your organization, your dinner club, your racist lovers and friends, your bar, your school, your bathhouse, your clinic, your hometown, your world.

From Fighting Words, which I found on Professor Kim's News Notes. Read the whole thing- it's so eloquent.
Very frightening. NSFW
The last chapter in the serious biographical ballad of me and my lab partner: We got an 86 on our poster. If I had only stayed up all night to get those four extra points! Then he'd get an A, and probably half my crazy check, as he would have gotten a 102 if it wasn't for me!
This religion paper is such a joy to research and write. I wonder if I am called to qualitative work.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

My parents are still upset about the dog. They agree that the medicine wasn't working. They agree that Dad had to carry him everywhere. They agree that the rugs were ruined. But it's hard to let go of the ritual of watering the dog, of feeding the dog, of letting the dog inside. Harry was not a puppy when we adopted him. Someone Mom knew's son had an allergy to dog hair. We took him in. I was 11. He was a good dog, always sitting on the deck panting, showing his blue tongue. This last Thanksgiving, he didn't even play with the children as he always did. He used to chase every ball.

I remember how he used to dig under the fence and escape. A few hours later, we always saw him at the front door. Our neighbor, a Japanese-American woman that I had to keep my brother from whistling at said "Harry won't come home" when this happened. But he always did. Now I guess he's at home. But I'm still a bit upset about the dog.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Why some people are paler than others. Also, support the Museum of the African Diaspora.
I feel an odd ache now. I saw this site and it nearly physically hurt that I didn't know that there was a new comic book by Dan Clowes out. I really need comics! I will go and buy some after I get home.
Good stuff.(NSFW) but needs more diversity.
Today I finished my European History test. Hopefully I will not get points off for saying that some Italians said that Mussolini made the trains run on time or that the Soviets put their army on Czechoslovakia. I also managed to dispose of my cans by giving them to my RA.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Andy Capp Hot Fries: It's Like a Taste of the Ghetto in Your Vending Machine. Also, you all must share my trauma.
Page estimate for the semester:

Methods Research Report 1: 12
Methods RR 2:24
Methods RR 3: 18
Methods Critique 1: 10
Methods Critique 2: 12
Art History Paper 1:4
Art History Paper 2: 5
Art History Essay Final: 1.5
European History Paper 1:4
European History Paper 2:5
European History Paper 3: 5
Religion Paper 1: 3
Religion Paper 2: 5
Religion Paper 3(estimate): 9

Total: 117.5 pages this semester.
This comic cover(NSFW) is somewhat grotesquely fascinating.
What I did today:
1 am: went to bed.
4:30 am: woke up
7:30 am: went on campus to look for food
8:30 am: took art history final
10:45: threw methods paper in slot and ran away.
11:00:mailed card for amnesty international.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

I wish I could win at the internet too. I have a hard time articulating how horrible it is to ignore hundreds of years of real discrimination and all the stuff we have going on now to focus on some petty irriation that affects either whites or men. It really says "Whites (or men) are more important than the rest of you." Also, the mocking of racist white feminists goes on. They aren't being mocked because of their race, but because of their refusal to learn. Of course, thier race is what makes it so easy for them to refuse to learn basic concepts, and spend all their energy defending their right to be lazy.

For those who want to be educated, here's a good basic article. I pulled this up while I was using google to look for the author of the poem that I'm supposed to write my take home essay on African art for. It's a good poem (the Ingrid Jonker poem)
Hey, people who want creationism in the schools! Why don't you take your kids to one of those nice buildings called 'churches'- they have crosses on the top, and lots of nice people will tell your kids all about creationism- and as a bonus- the love that Jesus has for them. There are also free activities. If you'd rather teach them yourself, here's a helpful website. I sometimes see people handing out free Bibles, but there are many websites like this one that can give you a free Bible. Seriously, I think the private sector has creationism covered, you know?
Share the road. Also, it seems like people in America might go hungry or freeze. I'm going to have to think of a way to keep that from happening.
More stuff I found in my email- I'm a bit of two minds on Tookie- he was kind of a bastard, what with killing four people, and starting a gang, but the death penalty is wrong, and even the worst person we have shouldn't get it, because of the many innocents that get caught in our net, and not to mention, the Tookie Williams of our future aren't going to stop their crimes because of it. This post expresses how I feel much better than I could express it. But on to the letter:

Dear Member,
Last night, as I stood outside the gates of San Quentin, I tried to think of what good could come from the killing that was happening inside. I couldn't think of anything. Several times I read Gov. Schwarzenegger's statement explaining why he denied clemency to Williams, looking for a logical explanation that I could accept, even if I didn't agree with it. I couldn't find that either.

Gov. Schwarzenegger missed an opportunity, and we suffered a loss. Schwarzenegger chose to follow a line of logic that was simple and flawed, refusing to acknowledge the benefit of Williams' work and going through pains to explicitly deny it. He dismissed the fact that the black community, which has borne the brunt of the effects of gang violence, largely stood in support of Williams. More troubling, Schwarzenegger cited Williams' celebration of Angela Davis, Malcolm X, and Mumia Abu-Jamal, among others--folks who many of us regard as heroes--as evidence that he hasn't truly shunned violence. Schwarzenegger doesn't realize that these folks are our heroes--strong voices who have followed their convictions, took amazing personal risks, and who above all have worked in service of social justice and a better society. Mr. Williams became one of those people, too.

Not a single life destroyed because of gangs or Mr. Williams will be brought back--not the victims of the crimes for Mr. Williams was accused and convicted, not the gang members whose lives have been destroyed because of the choices they made. And we, as a community that is attempting to take care of itself, lost a powerful voice.

To the 3,710 members who claimed ownership of Tookie Williams and his legacy, who engaged the complexity of the situation and stood up and made your voices heard, thank you. This is what we all hope to do--become informed, engaged, and stand up. And to those who gave the issue consideration but could not sign on, thank you too, for engaging the issue.

Our thoughts go out to those for whom Williams sought deliverance and redemption and to all those needing peace--Tookie Williams, himself, the victims of those who suffered as a result of Williams' actions or other gang activity, Tookie Williams' family, those affected by systemic injustice, and all of us. As we continue without the presence of Tookie, let's hope that each of us will do what we can to increase justice and spread peace, wherever we find ourselves--our communities, our country, our world. No doubt, it's the way Tookie would want us to support his legacy.

Thank You and Peace,

-- James Rucker
December 13th, 2005

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Daily Show has its daily riff on the war on Xmas. It reminded me of the nativity scene I saw at the theology library. It was very nice- although it appeared to be made of straw. But heck, I got the books for my religion paper, so I'm fine.
P6 reminds us to consider our personal responsibility. Mini google bomb: let's all link this post with personal responsibility.
Before I go back to the library, here's some more stuff I found in my email:

Dear Shannon,

Today, as we prepare to enter the holiday season in earnest, I’m writing to share some absolutely phenomenal news with you – news that gives new meaning to our motto at Modest Needs: ‘Small change: A World of Difference.’ As someone who I know supports the work we’re doing together at Modest Needs, this is going to make you very, very happy.

Earlier this month, I was invited to Los Angeles to meet with a well-known philanthropist who had recently discovered Modest Needs through the president of his own foundation. At the conclusion of an exceptional three hour meeting, this person – who has asked to remain anonymous for now – was so deeply moved by the kindness, compassion and community spirit of Modest Needs’ donors that he felt compelled to offer all of us a very special gift:

Beginning at midnight on 1 January 2006, this individual is going to personally match, dollar for dollar, every monthly pledge of any size that any person makes to Modest Needs – not just once, or twice, but every month for all of 2006!

This remarkable matching gift means that in 2006, your courageous generosity will have twice the power to change a life at Modest Needs. As of 1 January, a $5 monthly pledge at Modest Needs becomes worth $10 to a hard-working family struggling to make ends meet. A $10 monthly pledge becomes worth $20, and so forth (with no limit), up to a maximum of $25,000 matching dollars per month, all year long!

This is clearly incredible news to everyone who supports Modest Needs. But as much as I know this matching gift means to all of us, it will mean much more to the individuals and families who come to Modest Needs each month seeking the help they need to overcome a short-term crisis with dignity.

Over the past four years, Modest Needs has grown to the point that, with our ‘small change’ and ‘modest’ grants, we are now stopping the cycle of poverty for an average of one hard-working individual or family per day. All the same, as things currently stand, we often cannot reach persons whom we know both need and deserve our help – simply because we lack the funds to help them.

In 2006, if we can get this full match, we’ll have the power to help twice as many people next year as we were able to help in 2004 and 2005 combined. And because I know that all of us want to make the most of this remarkable opportunity, I’m writing to ask for your help with the most important project we’ve ever undertaken at Modest Needs.

I’ve just done the math, and as of today 12 December 2005, the total value of all monthly pledges to Modest Needs is just about $8500 a month. This means that as things currently stand, we’re going to be leaving enough money to help a minimum of 100 additional families every month – about $15,000 a month – just sitting on the table.

With so many people genuinely in need of our help every month, I don’t think any of us wants to see that happen. And that’s why I really need your help.

Normally, in Modest Needs’ Annual Appeal, I write to ask for a special one-time gift to carry us through the thin months of January, February and March. But one-time gifts aren’t covered by this matching gift, so even a generous one-time gift of, for example, $60 would be worth just its $60 face value.

However, that same gift - made as small monthly pledge of $5 - would be worth (after the match) twice its face value to the families who’ll come to us for help in 2006 – a whopping $120 next year! And that is truly what it means to leverage the power of our ‘small change’ to make a ‘world of difference’ to struggling individuals and families.

This holiday season, in lieu of a special one-time gift, I’m writing today to ask you if you would please help us take full advantage of this matching gift by making a small pledge of just $5 a month. That may not seem like much – it’s about $0.15 a day – but that small gift made today means that we’ll all be helping more people with ‘modest needs’ in 2006 than ever before.

Signing up for a monthly pledge at Modest Needs is quick, easy, and secure. All you have to do is go to, log in with your alias (Shannonw) and case-sensitive password (Mx94946), and make the pledge of your choice using our online form. Click ‘submit,’ and you’re done!

The whole process will take you less than two minutes. But with two minutes of your time, and genuinely ‘small change,’ you’ll be changing more lives at Modest Needs in 2006 than any of us would ever have thought would be possible.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you in advance for helping us to take full advantage of this remarkable matching gift. Especially now, and to the families who truly need our help to remain self-sufficient, your generosity means more than I could possibly express.

Here’s wishing you and your family a richly blessed holiday season. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

My very best,

Dr. Keith P. Taylor

President/Executive Director

Modest Needs Foundation

‘Small Change: A World of Difference’
Right on, user icon! Also, wussy white women are mocked. Oh, noes, they don't get to be racist on the internets! And mocked again!
Send a card to prisoners or human rights defenders. I'm sending one to the women in Algeria. I heard about this on Feminist Mormon Housewives.
An important lesson: Three years from now, no one will care whether you got an A in methods, but if you're a jerk to other people, they'll care. I bet there are tons of managers not getting the most they can out of people because they are condescending rude ass jerks.
Stuff I found in my email:

Great news for the BeltLine!

In an important step for the BeltLine project, the Atlanta Board of
Education voted this evening to approve the BeltLine Tax Allocation District
7 to 0. This is the second of three votes on the TAD. On November 7th the
Atlanta City Council voted overwhelmingly to approved the TAD 12 to 3.

The final vote by the Fulton County Commission is expected later this month.
Continue to show your support for the BeltLine and encourage your
commissioner to approved the BeltLine TAD. Contact information for your
county commissioner can be found at

Thank you for your continued support. We will continue to keep you updated
with the latest BeltLine news.

The BeltLine Partnership

Monday, December 12, 2005

Interactive MARTA map.
To cleanse my heart, I will list in a cute fashion

I don't like my lab partner
1)I hate it when I spend hours on graphs, editing text, arguing with some asshole at Kinkos, and he says I didn't do enough
2)I hate it when he decides to do stuff, doesn't tell me, and then wonders why I don't know?
3)I hate it when he interrupts me
4)I hate it when he repeats something I just fucking said to the poster grading people. LISTEN, GOD DAMN IT
5)I hate when he acts like having a nervous breakdown from stress isn't a serious problem.
6)I hate when he complains that I spent 5 minutes eating so I didn't pass out
7)I hate when he thinks he can talk to people any kind of way and then is shocked, shocked that people talk bad to him back.
8)I hate how he totally lost his perspective. I understand that I lost my perspective about methods too- but I didn't bother other people with it.
9)I hate how he bitches moans and whines
10)I can't think of a number ten, but I think I'm cleansed now.

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Flea gives us a good look at race and the porn industry.
This episode of Boondocks was the best yet. Very good satire there.
School related blogging. From art history, here's a picture of the great mosque of Kilwa. Also, in European history, I heard that a lot of the Free French army were African French people(from the colonies)
Go to the offical website for all your Kwanzaa questions.
In the 70s, my father got an F in college. Today he is oppressing the white man by designing phone systems. Happy finals, everybody! Also, on fark, I heard that evergreen trees are used for the seasonal celebration because they always stay green, even in the longest night of winter, so that people can remember to always have hope that spring will return. Keep that in your hearts, everybody!
This cheered me up after being annoyed by my lab partner. I hate people who are like "IT'S SUPER EASY TO DO A WHOLE NOTHER MINI LIT REVIEW OVERNIGHT". If it's so easy, why don't you do it? I got some ghetto advice from mom who advised me to tell him to go fuck himself.
WTF? This is horrible. God, I hate that liar Bush. Human rights! My asshole!
What a sad story about Iraq. Note that the man who did the honor killing noted that this is forbidden by Islam. A problem that westerners can see is that some women are born without hymens or break them without having sex. Note that Islamic women's groups are against this.
Jedmunds talks about why they mock wingnuts, and those are some of the same reasons I just basically yell,"FUCK YOU, RACIST" at affirmative action opponents. If they cared about facts and human decency, they'd look up the facts themselves. If white people weren't allowed in libraries, you'd think I'd hear about it. At least less people would be yelling about their sex lives while I am trying to study. With all the cauterwauling white people do about stuff they made up, I'm sure I'd hear about it if whites had to write out notes saying "Please let this cracker boy have some books by Tim Wise". It's not innocent ignorance, it's willful. They chose of their own free will not to care about black people, and I choose of my own free will to tell them to go fuck themselves.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Here's a MARTA related fark thread. I'm not sure why 'moving Africans rapidly through Atlanta' is supposed to be funny, or why anyone would be like OH,NOES, THE MARTA! The MARTA is so safe that even my paranoid ass gets on it. I feel safe on the MARTA at 10 o clock at night. The worst shit that I have ever seen on the MARTA was the time this guy tried to sell us bootlegged DVDs- we all ignored his pirating ass. The whole token situation is why I always buy a MARTA card, even if I can't always get a monthly. I hate tokens.

In other transit related news, try to get google to have a transit map of your city. All they have now is Portland.
EH! Azumanga! How could I have missed this?!? Also, I love Bleach's 1st ending song- the singer has no detectable accent. It's amazing.
Also, douchebag principal embarrasses the whole country by suspending a kid for speaking Spanish. Fool- that sounds like that crazy ass shit they used to do with the Native Americans, beating them and shit for speaking their native language. Racist as hell.
Know an awesome woman? Nominate her for the real hot 100.
I don't get why the lawmakers didn't just shut up and listen. These are your people- they are grieving and in pain. The point is to listen to the people, and you can decide whether you believe them or not later. But if you weren't there, and they were, why wouldn't you believe them in the first place?
Here's a system that tried economic integration, and did well. Fight for this in your own city.
I bought Post Dykes to Watch Out For, and it's so much easier reading it in book form than on the web. I'm going to collect all the books now. I was late to the party, and never figured out how this all came together.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

This post reminded me of how I can't get the concept that Jews walk to synagogue out of my head, even though I'm perfectly aware that many take cars. I think it's because when I was younger, sometimes we'd see well dressed people walking on the streets. I don't remember, but maybe it was explained to me that they were Jews and they had to avoid working on the Sabbath, and because it was the first piece of information I had, it's really hard to get rid of.

By using a bunch of random ideas I partially cribbed from Boyer, I'll attempt to explain this. Now, I imagine myself to have a template of a 'normal'(a black Christian American) person. All different groups have items added or subtracted. My template says "people go to church" and Jews are "people who go to 'church' by walking". So I have a sort of base that may or may not be examined, and different groups are thought of using this 'base'.

This is interesting, although I'm still at the point of my development in which I have a hard time conceiving of people having different goals. This is why I am often angry at people who are against equality(I mean equality that actually exists and can be measured) because I simply can't understand emotionally why you'd be against equality. As I feel that 'normal people' are for equality, so anti equality people seem really deviant.

But I don't get angry at "Jews have to go to temple on the High Holidays" because they are carrying out a shared goal "enjoy holiness and community" in a different way. I also don't get as mad at people who live in other countries having different goals, such as our goal is "don't die" so a widow throwing herself on a husband's funeral pyre is against that goal, but I guess I feel that if you're not in America, you're not required to have the same goals as the rest of Americans, but that Americans should share the same goals.

Trying to explore my mind is hard. I haven't done any work today- my stride is off because I threw up in the morning and fell asleep after class. At least my religion paper is slightly more done.
Half horrified, half amused.
Colbert mocks racist white people tonight. Colbert: Some of my best friends are Indians! (picture: Wacky Colbert with a grumpy looking Asian Indian) I have to admit every time I see Peggy Noonan, I think ha ha! it's the dolphin lady! I blame World O' Crap.
A touching Xmas post. My mom collects black santas. We only have one white santa- a family heirloom from when they didn't make black santas. I hope someday they'll produce black fairies- I loved fairies as a kid, and would get those little mass produced statues, but I was always disappointed that they didn't have any black ones.

In other race news, the case for integrated schools is made here. I went to an integrated school as a child, and you'll see it show up on me as I have a great amount of skepticism that white people are somehow better than regular people. It's because if you eat together, sleep together, eat your boogers together, it's hard to say that somehow when you grow up you'll be drastically different. But I was still sad when my white friends get socialized into the whole racist asshole stage. It's depressing, because you're like "didn't we run around in the mall and hit each other in the head with books together"? It's so hard for me to see a difference that I don't understand why others don't.

I don't mean that in the silly poppy 'let's pretend everything is equal no matter what" way, but really, in the South, we're near literally related. I bet if we could make a big family tree of the whites and blacks in the South, we'd find that we were all distant cousins. So as much as I am annoyed at the outgroup, part of me still sees us as all the same. The fact is the only reason whites are the outgroup is because you can't exactly have a group with one group in it that hates everybody else, you know? I don't think we can all be together when one group insists it is special, above the rest of us plebs. It's sad.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Someone on blackfolk has compiled census data. The numbers show that blacks are becoming more educated, but are still as poor as hell. I'm hoping that we can double our college numbers- so fuck you, whitey! We're going to go to school! Got $18? Give someone a gift subscription to Black Enterprise. Let's help everyone build assets. Remember to buy black- black business is black wealth.
Hell Yea.
Well, I'm going to write a letter to Lamar Alexander and tell him to apologize for not apologizing. Really, it costs nothing to say "hey, sorry for murdering all y'all". To begrudge such a small gesture- it's just an affront. Luckily, many others had better sense.
I'm very tempted to send a timer, but on the other hand, maybe I should be good and give to planned parenthood instead? PP is good because of the immediate medical care aspect, but this would help people be more aware of the FDA being fucked up with politics... Hmm...
In the war on Xmas, I'm on the Holiday side. I have put up a Holiday Gift Guide on my other blog.
I read this post and a deep sense of understanding filled me. I'm sure other people would like it too. Another PSA: if your jeans zipper is broken, go to a shop advertising alterations and get another zipper put in. (you could do it yourself if you had the talent) It's better to mend your jeans or at least buy used jeans than to always be buying new, I feel. I think when I get older, we'll be in a real pickle about the lack of oil- developing the skills to get more out of less now could be a good idea.
Stupid whites burn black folks' houses. And we've improved since the 60s, how? Tip: suck it the fuck up, and don't burn people's shit.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

In other news, some people really hate commercials in movie theaters.
Campaigns for divestment are sweeping across the country. In Atlanta, the Emory organization Paperclips for Peace is starting a divestment campaign. It's time for us to put the pressure on!
I tried to be forgiving yesterday- but I have to admit that today that I think all AA oponents need to wear signs saying "I begrudge black kids a college education" "I don't care about racism- all I care about is propping up the self esteem of whites who are too lazy to study" "I hate black people so much that I'm willing to ruin their lives to improve my self esteem".

Monday, December 05, 2005

I find it hard to forgive others who want to take out their brokenness on others by ruining their lives. I have a hard time being patient with them, and will usually just cuss them out. I don't know why. I guess it's because when I take my anger out on others I usually just do something like toss my shrimp out in the public garbage can or cuss out mean people, not begrudge people educations, take food out of babies' mouths and crush women trying to look for some sort of justice in this world.

I wonder if I'm really upset about all the terrorism and think we should defend the homeland- i.e. that we need to circle the wagons and start providing for everyone. If we leave some people out, it's unstable and wastes resources. We need all the resources we can find to fight against terror- worrying about whether your doctor has the right skin tone seems like an empty mockery in this world.

In Britain, they don't censor the news. You can see people being rushed out with sucking chest wounds on the day of a terror attack. How many more attacks will we have to suffer before we stop trying to hurt our own people, and try to atone for the wrongs that may be causing this? After the election, I was healed by people saying they were sorry, and the others replying that they knew we did our best.

But can I really say I did my best? Can I really say I have no responsibility for the problems in Iraq? I really feel we could have averted that tragedy. I don't know how we can ever atone. If an Iraqi mother who has lost a child in all of this somehow spoke to me, I don't know what I'd say to her.

I don't know why, but I feel a vague survivor's guilt. So many people are dying, but I can't even get a good grade in methods, because I always forget to write down the serial number of my PDA or something. Oh yea, and I read this, and started to babble on my blog.
Passbook, please? Retail discrimination is examined at Steve Gillard's blog. I'd like to note that while you're staring at me, who always pays for her items, some other person is stealing your shit. I have to admit that I like smaller stores for just this reason. The people at Eagle Eye bookstore are like hey, you got a card? Cool. At Rainbow, they are like, hey, you are using a backpack, 3 cents off. I like to go to stores where they recognize that my money is just as good as everyone else's.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

I have to admit I do do these online tarot readings although I'm not sure whether they make God mad or not. Although to be honest, anything could make supernatural entities angry- who can know the minds of such beings? My luck is so bad that I'm worried about the supernatural, even though I'm usually a devout atheist. The power of the tarot is that you interpret it with your mind and thus what you think the cards mean are what you were thinking anyway. Like my latest tarot card reading indicates that I'll move forward on methods with great force, but learn that methods is a stupid pointless subject that doesn't matter, and that having chinese food is really much more fulfilling to having success in school or a boyfriend.
Twisty brings us laughter through our tears at the horror of the patriarchy.

Totally unrelated, my dad says not to worry about outcomes but about processes instead, which made me feel better through my tears about methods.
Geh, it seems that assholes are using lies about the 'war against Christmas' to fool people into supporting that Alito. I hate idiot liars who enjoy destroying women's lives.

In good news, chinese food style coconut shrimp are good, and I got chocolate fudge in my chinese food.
I died of hilarity.
This userpic is half funny, but half kinda squicky.
Tomato Pickers Wanted.

Saturday, December 03, 2005

People found my blog because they are weird:

4 13.79% erection photos
3 10.34% silkeners and atlanta georgia
2 6.90% whining
2 6.90% disrespectful blacks riding marta
2 6.90% boondocks nigga moment
1 3.45% acting white myth
1 3.45% animeg
1 3.45% the origins teh myth that white people eat fish tacos
1 3.45% mad tv lowered expectations pamphlet
1 3.45% rydia wallpaper
1 3.45% egotistical
1 3.45% racist white girlfriend
1 3.45% dealing with egotistical candidates
1 3.45% fnorgby
1 3.45% boondocks nigga moments
1 3.45% egotistical symbols
1 3.45% dickless asian boyfriend
1 3.45% sleeping bitches wallpaper
1 3.45% scottie lowe atlanta
1 3.45% force white women cock
1 3.45% why don't i fit in anywhere?

The most mysterious one is about white people and fish tacos. Yesterday I went to a place called Burrito Brothers, and they had fish tacos, but I had chicken instead because I don't know...the idea of fish tacos creep me out somehow..
I saw Kamikaze Girls at Georgia State yesterday. Many adorable Atlanta lolitas were there, and the movie was both funny, heart warming and full of great fashion. I want to imitate the white tops that the Yankis wore in that movie, but I think I'll have to sew one myself- I can't wear tube tops because they always fall off. Also, I'm surprised that my favorite manga company Viz has brought this movie to the States. It's usually ADV that does releases of Japanese movies, I thought.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Yesterday won a record for sucking. I was up at 5:30 am and went to bed at 1 am.
I noticed today that MARTA is in on the evil conspiracy as well. At Five Points, the signs urged us all to have a happy holiday! I simply can't enjoy the wreaths or lights or giant Christmas trees erected at hosptials if a transportation system doesn't bow down at the altar of the baby jesus!
People march in the streets against racism. Awesome!
Do you hate hungry babies? Complain about cuts to food stamps, and donate tons of cans to your local food bank. In other news, I couldn't get the form to work(operator trouble most likely) so I sent this to Lamar Alexander:

As a citizen concerned about education, the possible cuts to food stamps in HR 4241 leave me concerned. It is well known that for children to be able to learn to their full potential, they need proper nutrition. We need all children properly nourished, so they can learn. We can not just rely on private charity- many food banks are near depleted from hurricane recovery, even though our citizens have been very generous.

Many working families rely on food stamps to make it through the month. Please invest in our nation's future by protecting our children.
Architecture for Humanity wants you to vote in their book cover survey. I recommend everyone vote for center title.
Amanda Marcotte notes that if you say something racist, hey, you're a racist. I blame it on white entitlement. They think they should be able to say whatever they want without getting any consequences.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Paradise Kiss survives the transitition to anime well. They have taken out a lot of the fourth wall breaking, but have kept much of the atmosphere that made the original manga so good. I wonder if they will keep in the more sexual plot twists. I was surprised that the Arashi/Miwako makeout scene was kept in, boobies and all. Although Miwako's breasts have been really toned down. In the manga, she was huge. I can't wait to see more! I've watched up to episode 3. Of course, the extra bits of surrealism before the opening are a bit odd, I think, and the ending song is fun, but what's up with Miwako's ass? Like wtf?
Well, it's blog against racism day. I'll start a series on the book The Hidden Cost of Being African American to celebrate. The Hidden Cost of Being African American is a book that needs reviewing now as the war on opportunity progresses. Not only does Shapiro give us the usual statistics that display the horror of the disparities between African Americans and Whites, he also puts it in a framework, that makes it near impossible for any sane rational person to say that the problems are because blacks are lazy scumbags. LetÂ’s take his first section on asset poverty and its effects. He notes that in 1999, fifty four percent of black families had less than $4175 in net financial assets, whereas only twenty five percent of white families did(37). He includes the fact that 54% of Hispanic families suffer in asset poverty(38), although this is a mostly black and white centered book. Be forewarnedd- this book is nothing like the lazy excuses for analysis that we are used to seeing. Shapiro actually looks up statistics, and interviews people for a more personal take on them- instead of sitting around with a beer and making up stuff like most pundits do. This review will mostly be me retyping the juicy juicy facts as I want the knowledge to flow to as many people as possible.

Shapiro points out that black people earn 54 cents for every dollar white people earn.(49). I think thatÂ’s messed up- thatÂ’s worse than the gender wage divide. They also have ten cents of wealth for every dollar of wealth that a white family has.(49) ItÂ’s at this point that his thesis emerges- the cost of the lack of vertical and horizonal wealth transfer for African Americans is a huge one. Next time- more juicy tidbits.
I think these guys are douchebags. Dude, not everyone celebrates your holiday, and even if people do, they want to talk about the whole season, not just one day. I mean, it's the 1st of December- it's not fucking Christmas! But all the Christmas celebraters are still excited about the festivities. Stop being assholes- we can all live together in harmony if some people would stop acting like their holiday was the only one being celebrated at this time. For fuck's sake, I simply can't tell if someone's an atheist or a Jew or a Jehovah's Witness just by looking at them. So of course, I'll just give a general happy greeting.

I personally don't celebrate Christ's birthday. I simply content myself with the idea that if he had lived, Jesus would be pleased with the closeness of family and friends,etc. Seriously, dudes, do you think Jesus would be kicking up a fuss about what people called his birthday or do you think he'd be at the soup kitchen? You all know where I place my bets...
Hahhaa, I'm glad those assholes got disciplined. You can't ruin someone's life by not doing your job, idiots. Mind your own business, thank you. We women will deal with the states of our own souls,ok?

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

The first thing I thought while reading this is I wish I had a Passat. Unfortunately, I'll never have one since psychology methods makes me break down in hysterical tears. All day. For two days in a row.
I took a long study break to go to the break dancing exhibition. Students from Georgia State popped, beat boxed, and did floor flares to much applause. Their costuming was also great- the best costume I saw was a girl in a relaxed pinstripe suit type outfit with a string of fake pearls. I also got a unity t shirt for answering a question. I'm glad because this was my last unity month, and I think I would have regretted not getting a t shirt. I got a t shirt last year for answering a question during Better Luck Next Time. I'm not sure why they call diversity unity instead, but it's great fun.
I've discovered that I'd be happier moving to Madagascar where they haven't even heard of methods, and the idea of seven page long instructions for papers is foreign. Even if they do have instructions for papers that are longer than most people's arms, I wouldn't have to do any of them.
It's sad, but the first thing I thought when reading this article was "Hmm, they have a woman leader"

Monday, November 28, 2005

Even though I've been more able to work than usual, I have only gotten 3 good hours logged on my critique. I wonder how I can master my rhythm. The caffeinated tea I drank earlier still beats in my veins, but the concentration is gone. The clarity of mind I once had leaves me. An acquaintance of mine will go on medical leave this fall. I'm not sure it's physical. Sometimes I wish I could leave too- but I must keep going. I graduate in May, after all.
I made a flickr account. Yahoo loves buying stuff up, doesn't it?
Hey, there's finally an Atlanta Movie Fans meetup! Also, the new backlinks seems to be set to allow as a default now. Good!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Note to white folks: Boondocks is merely a funny cartoon program. If I hear some white dude blaming his ignorant acting ass on the Boondocks, I'm going to have a nigga moment.
I'm going to use 43 Things as a To Do List. It'll help organize me, and plus I can put things that are low priority on there too.
Yay, I downloaded all six episodes of Paradise Kiss. I'll have something good on my breaks from finals hell. Well, back to sleep.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Canada is going in for programs to reduce Native poverty. The US should follow its example if they back up their words with action.
Well, you can fight the global digital divide by donating money. Note that African heads of state were the ones pushing for this. Although they should not take only paypal or bank transfers. It may scare away donors.
Pinko Feminist Hellcat gives us all a clue on a subject that really bothers me. How concerns that affect people like women and minorities are considered to be small concerns, but all the sudden, we're all supposed to care about rich white males or sometimes maybe rich white women. When poor folks make some money, people talk about the evil unions, but when some white guy makes a million bucks a year driving a company into the ground, it's the free market,etc,etc. How fucked up is that?

Also, more clueification on classism. She's on a roll!
Here's a better written reiteration of an idea that I have touched on before.
The horrible practice of human dumping continues unabated. Also, beautiful, beautiful irony, although I hope the price of bell peppers won't go up again.
A cheery Census Bureau thing with Asian facts. Also, did you know that March is Irish-American Heritage Month? Can I claim to be part Irish and drink green beer?
Ornicus finishes his series on how Michelle Malkin exemplfies lying about how supposedly crazy left wingers are, while continuing to be a crazy right winger.

Friday, November 25, 2005

I am amused by this picture.
I'm watching Anna and the King. This movie seems to have some mighty whitey overtones, but it has really nice costuming. We watched Shaft in Africa yesterday just because of the great 70s costumes. We also watched Daddy Daycare, but the costumes were only so so.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Islamic Q&A from a British Shi'a cleric.
On Salon, I found an article that annoyed me in its factual errors. This paragraph really bothered me:

But at the same time the definition of treatable depression was watered down -- renamed as social anxiety disorder, panic disorder and, my personal favorite, generalized anxiety disorder -- to include a seemingly endless demographic of adults and children

Anxiety disorders and depression are not the same thing. Social anxiety disorder is a disorder in which you are so frightened of people you can barely function. Panic disorders involves panic attacks frequently, and sometimes involves acrophobia- in which the person barely goes outside, and what's so good about generalized anxiety disorder? Jumping at small noises, and having back pain so bad you think you have a kidney stone for no good reason is not the same as lying in bed wishing you were dead because of your worthlessness.

If a senior psychology student could notice that he's lumping two separate, although slightly related disorders together, why couldn't his editor do the same? He could have even checked out online what these disorders were. And for his well it's not really that hard, just man up advice?

I'm sorry, but that's not going to work. When you could get a decent job with a high school degree(OK, if you were white, but if you weren't,well, you were screwed) , maybe not being able to write 20 pages a week of papers wasn't really a big deal. The bar for success is higher now. College is now the key- back in the day, it was high school. I'm trying to apply for a master's degree, but even with that level of education, I'm not going to be able to make much money.

I could have achieved more if I was not wary of taking study drugs. Often my studies are impaired by the fact that I require more sleep than normal people(about 8 hours a night, and sometimes ten). The human body has limits. All of us come with different ones. We have no safety net. They are cutting food stamps. We have no national health care. Republicans have circled Social Security like sharks. I don't blame my classmates for taking drugs. Sometimes it's that or become part of the despised underclass.
I'm worried that I am exerting too much energy this holiday season. I've been talking to people from 12 pm to 9:20. Now I have to write a paper. And I'll have to talk to people tomorrow as well.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Yay, beads!
I wish I had ice cream. Everyone should try this website. Buy stuff, and I'll be able to eat ice cream. Uh..I made up the slogans on the buttons and magnets. I also made the jewelry.
I'd like to submit that looking for a partner is soul sucking, self esteem crushing, and in general, horrible. I sometimes think I'd prefer arranged marriages although I've read enough books to know better. It's so soul crushing because at the exact horrible moment of quarter life crisis, the moment in which you hear someone is interviewing at Harvard Med school, and you won't even make the deadlines for social work school, the horrible voice in your head that accompanies all these realizations whispers "and she has a boyfriend". It's the coup de grace in the revealation of your lack of worth.

You can say you never wanted to go to med school. You can talk about how you hate blood. You can talk about how the 100 hour weeks for some shitty wage for years on end aren't really worth it in the end. But it's hard to argue with a boyfriend, because everyone has one. But you. Girls who spent their afternoons with legs in the air while you were studying algebra and now have ten unruly brats to show for it? Boyfriend. That creepy guy at the snake handling church whose testimony was about how he killed two people? Girlfriend. Suicide Bombers? Girlfriends. Drug Addicts? Boyfriends, girlfriends, whateverelsefriends out the wazoo. Even ten year olds are blissfully paired off.

But, there's you- the only person on the entire planet who is unpartnered? Well, you must not be trying hard enough. Instead of sleeping so you can actually go to class and not fail college, you should stand night after night in loud clubs where you can't hear anyone, while tall large breasted girls get off with all the guys. Or maybe you should suffer through frat parties, despite having grown out of them freshman year? Sit in smoky bars for no good reason at all, while your thirty pages of papers to do sit at home undone?

Sure, maybe today you could barely get yourself to type up a survey or fix yourself a cup of tea, but taking on another full time job? Easy Peasy. Yet again, I hate everybody and wish they would all die. Meeting people in everyday life? Not a chance. Today, I overslept and was nearly late for a quiz- putting on a fuckton of makeup? Yea right. Dressing like a slut? It's 40 fucking degrees outside.

People say "be confident" They are crazy. Nothing will make you hate yourself more than a venue in which everything can be wrong. My hair is probably too nappy, maybe I should straighten it? No, my hair looks like a hot mess straight. Should I go to a demotologist? But does anyone notice the old scars of long gone acne? Maybe if I was thinner? But I really can't lose much more weight. Well, what if I dressed sluttier? I already did that. What if you pretended not to be interested in fun things? No, that's too fake. Oh no, too forward with my interests! I'm sure that scared him away! Maybe I should talk more? Geh, I talked too much. Everything can go wrong, and if it does, it's all your fault fot being a horrible person. But if you give up, you're a horrible person too.

You can't win, and there's no cure.

Monday, November 21, 2005

The white folks whining about Asians come in for a new level of mockery. So remember- racists- everyone is laughing at you.
Ah, a lovely merger of fashion and politics. I don't get the resident troll's take on this. I mean seriously, are Republicans going to go "Well, saving kids from dying of AIDS is bad, because a guy had on an outfit that riffed on gay marriage"? I seriously doubt it. Speaking of Republicans, watch out for the Council of Conservative Citizens. They have merely changed the name from White Citizen's Councils, but apparently have a racist agenda.
Tip: If you're white, here's a style guide to when you might want to shut the hell up.

Now, as a black person, our culture has a concept we call shutting the hell up. This is if you're going to say something stupid, you avoid saying it. Sometimes, cultural appropiation can be a good thing.

1)If you're about to utter a sentence that has the words 'reverse racism' in them, and you're not making fun of the stupid. There are many good books that explain what the word 'racism' means, and what racism is. Read them.

2)If you're about to call blacks or anyone else 'racist'. Read a book, and remember- whites do not have a special anti criticism clause, not to mention, why don't you change your own damn behavior before talking about shit you don't know about?

3)If you're about to talk about how white men can't get a break in this society, shut up and read a book. Also, try to appropiate the concept of 'reality'. You know, stuff that's actually happening?

4)If you're going to talk about how the fact that you ate ramen noodles for a week because you were in between parental handouts means that you triumphed over poverty, and so everyone should be able to do this. (Ok, this is actually pan racial.)

5)If you are going to talk about black culture, shut the hell up. Rap videos are part of black culture like rock videos are part of white culture(although whites tend to control the production of rap more than blacks control the production of rock). It's a very small part. Also, making shit up based on racist notions from 1840 is just plain dumb.

6)If you're going to talk about how blacks do X, because you once saw one black do X, shut the hell up. I mean there are documented cases(i.e. not made up) of white people eating human flesh, but I am sure this is not typical behavior. Yea, I'm sorry that the black kids in your school beat you up. Maybe it was because you were an asshole.

7)If you want to talk about how you're not attracted to black people, shut the hell up. No one cares that you're a racist asshole who can't tell millions of people who look completely different apart. And don't talk about your weird Asian fetish- it's a bit creepy.

8)Don't talk about Africa at all unless you actually know something about it. You should hopefully have a masters before you open your mouth. And on Africa- fool.

9)Don't talk about how famous blacks would be for a whites only America. If you can read this, you can read their work, fool.

10)Don't talk about how black people are lying about racism. There's tons of books on the existence of racism, dumbass. Reality- it's a good idea.

11)Basically, if you don't know shit, have an inflated sense of entitlement or are just being a dumbass, shut the hell up. Ok, that's pan racial, but the system of white supremacy allows whites to show that they are douchebags a whole lot. Maybe a good start in not being a douche would be reading the online articles of Tim Wise.
Gillard says- Turkeys Needed. To tell the truth, all I have is a can of tuna fish, so someone with an actual turkey to give should try to give, you know?

Sunday, November 20, 2005

The interesting part of this Boondocks episode is that the ho apparently is supposed to be black, but doesn't look like it. (otherwise that wouldn't say she was lightskinned nor would they call her a fake ass Mariah Carey) I'd make a long post about the racial politics of all this, but it'd take a long ass time.
WTF? Also check out my google base.
Stupid whiny whites fight intelligent people over World Nut Daily article which hopes to distract whites from the fact our gov't sucks and Republicans are fucking them and their poor white brethren over by worrying them about what some Canadians are doing. Also, some Canadian guy says that minorities in Canada feel discriminated against.

I think the difference between liberals and conservatives are that liberals are connected to the actual. For example, I find the idea that whiteness makes you qualified for jobs confusing because to me, whiteness means you have pale skin, and possibly some very funny ideas. But maybe, they aren't talking about actually being able to do the job, but some Mussolini like(I associate this with Mussolini after reading him say that the Italians won the war when they lost it) qualification of the soul. It's the same for equality. When I say it, I mean equality of results- i.e. actual, empirically measurable things. But they mean equality of opportunity- in which they just feel things are equal whether they are or not. This divide between actually doing stuff and not actually doing stuff is the difference between liberal and conservative, and often between black and white.
Man, now white folks are bitching about there being too many Asians in their school. Let that be a lesson to folks who try to use Asians as a way to bash black folk. It ain't us, and it ain't Asians- it's the white folk.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Yea, It's a repost of America's Second Harvest URL. I can only give them like ten bucks,ok? But if a lot of other people all gave them ten bucks, a lot of people would be eating,ok?
P6 fights the stupid. And dude, if folks teased you in school, don't take it out on all the rest of us black folk,ok? Just one comment, though. One other possible confound is that high GPA black kids may end up being placed in honors and AP with the white kids. I did talk to other blacks in high school, but mostly in the few classes I had on the regular track, in the lunch room, and outside of school. I was tracked with nearly all whites, so thus, I had more white friends than black. I'm not sure if they removed this possible confound. Also, what if blacks who go to schools with more whites are richer(and thus more likely to have high GPAs)? That could also confound the research.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Items that I think others should know from the Right Stuf e-newsletter:

*** Anime Today Podcast Launches! ***
Finally there's a show that focuses just on what you want to know: the Anime Today
Podcast Show!

Brought to you by Right Stuf International, every other week Anime Today's hosts,
Rich and Nick, along with a team of special guests, bring you a look at what's new
and what's hot in the world of anime and manga!

Each episode features reviews of titles from the major anime studios, a special
insider's look at the anime industry from our production team, as well as segments
like "The Anime and Gamer's Guide to Japan" and "Anime Today Q&A," where listeners
can call in and leave their own questions on anime and Japanese culture!

Plus, in our debut episode, we'll be revealing two exciting contests we have
running this month!

Ready to listen in? You can download the debut episode from the main page:

*** TCM's Studio Ghibli Tribute! ***
This coming January, the cable network Turner Classic Movies will be airing
several Studio Ghibli films! There will be two shown each Thursday, according to
the current schedule:

January 5th: Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away
January 12th: Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind and Castle in the Sky
January 19th: My Neighbor Totoro and Porco Rosso
January 26th: Only Yesterday and Pom Poko.

As always, these dates could be subject to change, so check your local listings
for exact air dates and times!
The Colbert Report helped me learn about this important proposal that can hopefully lead to a greater support to not have terrible fucking health care in this country.
Apparently they didn't cut Pell Grants for the poor. You still need to give food, blood, etc.
My swim teacher wears these shoes. Today we practiced jumping off the diving board and swimming to either the wall or rope without any gear(we started off with fins and a floating board). She wanted me to go to the rope(I'm always picked on as I'm the worst person in the class) but I said I didn't have the strength. I have difficulity swimming both because I'm not strong enough and because I can't figure out how to breathe. I can now swim at least 15 yards on my front without stopping. I can swim up to 50 yards on my back without stopping now. Before I took the swim class, I could barely even get in the water because I have been frightened of water since I nearly drowned at a water park when I was 7.

Well, at least my top didn't flip over completely this time. The last time we practiced jumping off the wall my tankini top flipped completely up and I had to fix it underwater.