mendemama on blackfolks explains why femininity is a raw ass deal:

go to a craigslist rants and raves and there are white men bitching how American (Read:white) women are too fat, too masculine, too career obsessed, have hair too short . . . . .

and that's why they're ONLY dating Asian/Eastern European/Martian women. Of course, it's always the woman's fault for not being feminine enough. No mention of the power dynamic inherent in a woman having to be less than. I mean a green card is a hell of an incentive to put up with bullshit.

We're supposed to be all these things, pay dutch, clean house, give him the big piece of chicken, remember his mama's birthday, keep our hair long, go to the gym and pass up that peach cobbler . . . . .until the newer model comes in and we're placed on the trash heap. And better NOT ask for any alimony or child support. Cause then we're gold-digging heiffas doncha know.

Not with THAT program. I absolutely love men. . . .but I'm finding that they make better friends or f-buddies these days. Which might be news to my boyfriend. (tee-hee) Because we're all carrying around too many expectations, misconceptions and whole buncha other shit.

You know what? For me and mine, I'm choosing the good deal, not the shitty one.