Ok, I was reading that transphobic Heart again, and then I realized that her pal Britta posted something I wanted to reply to, so you guys will have to give me a moment,ok?

Rebecca Whisnant gave a great presentation, comparing 2nd and 3rd wave feminists - 3rd wave feminism largely promotes individualism and choice, a “willful myopia to the effects of one’s choices in a broader culture of sexual dominance,” or, in the words of Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards in their book Manifesta, “Feminism isn’t about the choice you make, it’s about your freedom to make that choice.” This contrasts with the prevalent 2nd wave feminist knowledge that “women are a class, sharing a common condition,” and that the fate of one woman is tied to the fate of all women, whether she likes it or not. Thus, the question is not so much “Did she choose X?” as it is “Does X further the oppression of women as a whole?” In general, 2nd wave feminists embraced responsibility for the broader results of their personal choices…whereas 3rd wave feminists are so afraid of being seen as essentialist, and are “reluctant to speak in an assumed and potentially false solidarity.” But it’s not as simple as saying any choice a woman makes is a feminist choice, so long as she freely chooses it, for that ignores the effects our choices can have on *each other*.

I'm 2.5 here. I'm not into the whole "feminism is about choices" thing because I can choose anything. I can choose to call you a cunt, I can choose to say that rape is acceptable, I can choose to do tons of shit that isn't feminist. Then again, all women don't have a common condition- poor sex working transwomen with AIDs in the third world have it way worse than I do, and have many different experiences from I. But then again, there are ways that we should be responsible for ourselves and our choices.

The truth is that no matter how much we'd like to have it otherwise, there's no such thing as a free lunch. Nobody thinks you're as special as you think you are. If you make a choice that has a negative effect on other women, such as acting like the other woman enticed the man to cheat on his own and giving all the blame to her instead of giving any blame at all to the man, and somebody feminist walks by and calls you on it? That's life!

If you are always talking about how 13 year old girls are 'fast' and somehow deserve to be catcalled and harassed by men and some feminist calls you on it? Oh woopty do! That's life!

If you're pretending that gendered behavior comes hardwired in, and wonderbras just fall from the sky and some feminist says that's not correct? You know what? Tough fucking cookies!

If you're grown enough to say that your choices are sacred, you're grown enough to take responsibility for them.