Into every life, some rain must fall, the saying goes. However, people think this means the rain falls evenly. Some people have a lot of sunshine and some a lot of rain. Chance and luck plays a part in this that most don't want to admit- none of my actions caused me to be born in America, where I could get an education and have tons of food. I was also born in the middle class. However, I also am shorter than my peers, soft spoken and just intelligent enough to know that there are problems, but not a super genius. Of course, the society I live in has also shaped the rain in my life. I tend to realize things that while uncomfortable are probably true.

For example, I realize that in this society, I am not really valued. I'm not extroverted, nor am I good at math(I mean in the way that lets you become a doctor, not in the math for math's sake way- I hear the latter have a hard time) , nor am I beautiful. Some people think that who I am makes me worth less(there really are people out there who aren't fond of blacks or don't like women) This of course goes against the grain.

I also realize that for me, the old trite sayings no longer really have any meaning. 'Do what you love' sounds great- but hasn't anyone noticed all the waiters who want to be actors or think they are writers? 'Try your best!' also rings hollow in a success based society. It sounds good, but who has your back when you fail? Certainly not the people saying that.

While this is better than starving to death, I certainly can't be happy about it just because others are miserable. I never did get people that somehow thing that just because others are dying horrible deaths of AIDS, I'm supposed to be happy. That actually just makes me sad. Of course, I recognize that if we didn't have a bunch of asshats thinking that 'if they just tried harder not to get AIDS, they wouldn't have it, so we shouldn't help them', that situation would actually get a lot better.

The problem is that if you let a bunch of trite crap blind you to reality, you tend to cause a lot of suffering. Of course, noone is going to be convinced of the importance of kindness to their fellow man, seeing problems realistically, so to get a real fix, and that lives aren't created equal by reading my blog, but maybe someone's on the borderline- already being pretty decent, and sees this and says 'hey, maybe she's right'. Probably not tho.